Dearest e-votees,
The gospel text is a hard one. It is a hard one to read. It is a hard one to preach. It is a hard one for one who has been divorced and has remarried to read and to preach.
One of the reasons for having assigned lectionary readings is for holding our feet to the fire. It would be way too easy to routinely duck this text if I was the one making the choices for which lessons we would use. It is in abiding in our broken places that healing can come. It is in letting all of Jesus' words fall on our ears that we can best truly hear the good news--aka the gospel.
Peace,
Karl
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2 Some Pharisees came, and to test him they asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” 3 He answered them, “What did Moses command you?” 4 They said, “Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of dismissal and to divorce her.” 5 But Jesus said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart he wrote this commandment for you. 6 But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ 7 ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, 8 and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. 9 Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
10 Then in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter. 11 He said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her; 12 and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.”
13 People were bringing little children to him in order that he might touch them; and the disciples spoke sternly to them. 14 But when Jesus saw this, he was indignant and said to them, “Let the little children come to me; do not stop them; for it is to such as these that the kingdom of God belongs. 15 Truly I tell you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will never enter it.” 16 And he took them up in his arms, laid his hands on them, and blessed them.
Mark 10:2-16, NRSV
As discerned from Genesis God's intention for those who choose to get married is that they would leave their parents and become one flesh. They would enter into a lifelong partnership where both are lovers and partners and helpers for one another. The intimacy of the partnership would even trump that of their families of origin as they would leave their parents and cling to one another. As God leads and directs such holy unions people have no business separating (or "putting asunder" as some marriage liturgies say).
These intentions of God are still, I believe, at work. But we have strayed from God's intention. Just as the first man and the first woman who already were of one flesh had hard hearts and lust for knowledge of good and evil in their eyes we too are prone towards hard hearts and wanting to be the controllers of our own fates.
When Jesus says that the Pharisees have hard hearts, when it comes to divorce, he is saying that they are like Pharaoh (whose heart was constantly calcifying during the 10 plagues). Pharaoh had little regard for the misery and pain he was bringing upon the Hebrews slaves and the Egyptian people by refusing to set the Hebrew people free. His desire to control and lord his influence over the people came to disastrous results. Jesus says that it is such hearts as Pharaoh's that people wanting to expediently dismiss an inconvenient spouse have. Those who choose divorce are pushing against God's best intentions for us. We demonstrate our calcified hearts and our adulterous natures. This is indeed a hard text to read as a divorced person and to preach to a congregation with many divorced people. But Jesus holds fast to God's first intentions for marriage.
There are times when divorce may be the best option. Jesus allows it in the chase of unfaithfulness in Matthew 19. What exactly is "unfaithfulness" is interesting to ponder. Can one be unfaithful through workaholism? Can one be unfaithful by being emotionally aloof? Can one be unfaithful by spending too much time and devotion to friends? Or hobbies? Or ...? Surely there is more to unfaithfulness than just physical interactions. We could spend much time pondering when and what exactly divorce might be permissible in Jesus' eyes.
What Jesus really seems to be doing is not chastising those who have been divorced so much as speaking to those who might allow their hearts to be hardened to allow divorce. Divorce isn't a one time legal decree. Divorce is a series of hardenings and separations. God wants us to be soft of heart and seeking to be more connected with God. God wants us, who are married, to be soft of heart and seeking to be more connected with our partner. Jesus wants to stop the hardening and the separation.
The Pharisees are trying to get Jesus to commit to when divorce is appropriate. Jesus responds to the much deeper issue, which can certainly lead to divorce, of our hard hearts and our desire to sever connections. When Jesus met the Samaritan woman who had 5 husbands previously (and presumably had been divorced several times) he offered her living water and not condemnation. Perhaps we, as the church, should approach people who have abided the throes of divorce much more like Jesus.
I wouldn't wish the pain and torment of divorce on anyone. My hardness of heart and wanting to be in control certainly came into play as our marriage came undone. I will forever bear the scars from that excruciating experience. But I trust in Jesus who showed love and compassion on the woman who was caught in adultery. Jesus offers forgiveness and new starts. Jesus calls me an adulterer. But he also called Paul (nee Saul) an accomplice to murder to follow him. And he also called Peter who was quick to betray him when things got rough to follow him. And he called James and John who were partial to being noticed and recognized and exalted to follow him. And he calls me day after day to follow him. And he calls you.
Jesus calls us to have our hearts softened and to return to God. In the process our hearts will hopefully soften as we regard ourselves and others in the shadow of God's grace and new starts. That surely is some portion of the answer of Jesus' prayer for unity in John 17.
God, soften our hearts and bring us into your best desires for us your children. Give us grace and courage to minister to all who have suffered hardening and exclusion. Amen.
I have been writing these e-vos for quite some time (this is the 468th post since I started using the http://e-vos.blogspot.com URL in 2007). It has been a challenge, as you may have noticed, to publish regularly each Wednesday. I am planning to continue on to 500 posts and then take a substantial if not permanent break from writing this devotion series. My hope and prayer is that this has been a blessing to you. Thank you for reading them and the encouraging comments that have come my way.
The gospel text is a hard one. It is a hard one to read. It is a hard one to preach. It is a hard one for one who has been divorced and has remarried to read and to preach.
One of the reasons for having assigned lectionary readings is for holding our feet to the fire. It would be way too easy to routinely duck this text if I was the one making the choices for which lessons we would use. It is in abiding in our broken places that healing can come. It is in letting all of Jesus' words fall on our ears that we can best truly hear the good news--aka the gospel.
Peace,
Karl
------------
2 Some Pharisees came, and to test him they asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” 3 He answered them, “What did Moses command you?” 4 They said, “Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of dismissal and to divorce her.” 5 But Jesus said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart he wrote this commandment for you. 6 But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ 7 ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, 8 and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. 9 Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
10 Then in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter. 11 He said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her; 12 and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.”
13 People were bringing little children to him in order that he might touch them; and the disciples spoke sternly to them. 14 But when Jesus saw this, he was indignant and said to them, “Let the little children come to me; do not stop them; for it is to such as these that the kingdom of God belongs. 15 Truly I tell you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will never enter it.” 16 And he took them up in his arms, laid his hands on them, and blessed them.
As discerned from Genesis God's intention for those who choose to get married is that they would leave their parents and become one flesh. They would enter into a lifelong partnership where both are lovers and partners and helpers for one another. The intimacy of the partnership would even trump that of their families of origin as they would leave their parents and cling to one another. As God leads and directs such holy unions people have no business separating (or "putting asunder" as some marriage liturgies say).
These intentions of God are still, I believe, at work. But we have strayed from God's intention. Just as the first man and the first woman who already were of one flesh had hard hearts and lust for knowledge of good and evil in their eyes we too are prone towards hard hearts and wanting to be the controllers of our own fates.
When Jesus says that the Pharisees have hard hearts, when it comes to divorce, he is saying that they are like Pharaoh (whose heart was constantly calcifying during the 10 plagues). Pharaoh had little regard for the misery and pain he was bringing upon the Hebrews slaves and the Egyptian people by refusing to set the Hebrew people free. His desire to control and lord his influence over the people came to disastrous results. Jesus says that it is such hearts as Pharaoh's that people wanting to expediently dismiss an inconvenient spouse have. Those who choose divorce are pushing against God's best intentions for us. We demonstrate our calcified hearts and our adulterous natures. This is indeed a hard text to read as a divorced person and to preach to a congregation with many divorced people. But Jesus holds fast to God's first intentions for marriage.
There are times when divorce may be the best option. Jesus allows it in the chase of unfaithfulness in Matthew 19. What exactly is "unfaithfulness" is interesting to ponder. Can one be unfaithful through workaholism? Can one be unfaithful by being emotionally aloof? Can one be unfaithful by spending too much time and devotion to friends? Or hobbies? Or ...? Surely there is more to unfaithfulness than just physical interactions. We could spend much time pondering when and what exactly divorce might be permissible in Jesus' eyes.
What Jesus really seems to be doing is not chastising those who have been divorced so much as speaking to those who might allow their hearts to be hardened to allow divorce. Divorce isn't a one time legal decree. Divorce is a series of hardenings and separations. God wants us to be soft of heart and seeking to be more connected with God. God wants us, who are married, to be soft of heart and seeking to be more connected with our partner. Jesus wants to stop the hardening and the separation.
The Pharisees are trying to get Jesus to commit to when divorce is appropriate. Jesus responds to the much deeper issue, which can certainly lead to divorce, of our hard hearts and our desire to sever connections. When Jesus met the Samaritan woman who had 5 husbands previously (and presumably had been divorced several times) he offered her living water and not condemnation. Perhaps we, as the church, should approach people who have abided the throes of divorce much more like Jesus.
I wouldn't wish the pain and torment of divorce on anyone. My hardness of heart and wanting to be in control certainly came into play as our marriage came undone. I will forever bear the scars from that excruciating experience. But I trust in Jesus who showed love and compassion on the woman who was caught in adultery. Jesus offers forgiveness and new starts. Jesus calls me an adulterer. But he also called Paul (nee Saul) an accomplice to murder to follow him. And he also called Peter who was quick to betray him when things got rough to follow him. And he called James and John who were partial to being noticed and recognized and exalted to follow him. And he calls me day after day to follow him. And he calls you.
Jesus calls us to have our hearts softened and to return to God. In the process our hearts will hopefully soften as we regard ourselves and others in the shadow of God's grace and new starts. That surely is some portion of the answer of Jesus' prayer for unity in John 17.
God, soften our hearts and bring us into your best desires for us your children. Give us grace and courage to minister to all who have suffered hardening and exclusion. Amen.
I have been writing these e-vos for quite some time (this is the 468th post since I started using the http://e-vos.blogspot.com URL in 2007). It has been a challenge, as you may have noticed, to publish regularly each Wednesday. I am planning to continue on to 500 posts and then take a substantial if not permanent break from writing this devotion series. My hope and prayer is that this has been a blessing to you. Thank you for reading them and the encouraging comments that have come my way.
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